Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Paging Sports Illustrated
I've subscribed to Sports Illustrated for about 15 years now. I generally try to get one of those deals where you get savings of Up to 75% and Up to 12 issues and a gift -- FREE with paid renewal. I subscribe for as long as I can, because I absolutely cannot stand the renewal process. Last week, I got an Important Notice About My Account that encouraged me to renew my subscription by replying to this notice by April 10, 2009. This made me wonder when my subscription actually expired. Sports Illustrated was nice enough to tell me that my subscription doesn't expire until July 27, 2009, a time which is roughly four months from now.

Basically, what they're telling me is that I need to renew and start paying them now, otherwise I have four more months of Annoying Mail From Them, which includes many suspicious claims that they are offering me the Best Possible Deal, when I really suspect that they're offering me the Same Old Damn Deal, whether I renew now or on July 26.

So I checked the box for three years (and 12 Bonus Issues). Free gift-wise, I think I'll go for the SI Toiletry Kit, which I will give to my dog. He can just chew it up, or use it for travel.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

St. Patrick's Day, The Pogues and Joe Strummer
Normally, I'd be disinclined to run a video of The Pogues without Shane MacGowan (who is, as of this moment, still alive). I would make an exception for The Pogues with Joe Strummer doing London Calling, in London, on St. Patrick's Day, 1988, which is what this is.

Have a good St. Patrick's Day. Go Siena.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Me and the Dancing Prilosec Woman
I watched a lot of college basketball and World Baseball Classic on TV this weekend. Damn that Felipe Lopez.

Evidently, Prilosec is a big sponsor of sports on TV, because I feel like I saw this commercial during every break.

What the hell? I acknowledge criticism of commercials is about the lowest form of humor, but I can't get this out of my head. So I'll take a shot at it, Larry King USA Today column stream-of-consciousness style:

What kind of club is this, anyway?...This is how white people dance when there's no music...Wow, huge hair flip by that woman in the back who looks like she needs a stripper pole...I guess she's dancing like nobody's watching...I sure wish I wasn't...But I can't turn away...This is a joke, right?...Elaine from Seinfeld...She's so happy because now -- thanks to Prilosec -- she can drink at a club without suffering excruciating heartburn...I recommend tequila shots...Katie's no kid, she's gotta be pushing 40, who goes to a club and dances like that at that age?...So the one guy looks like he might get lucky tonight...The finger point, I am speechless...She's gotta be on more than Prilosec...Maybe somebody dosed her white zinfandel...I suspect the stripper chick...So, umm, Brian, how's the book coming along?...Now that she's on Prilosec, she can go to IHOP after the clubs close and eat a corned beef hash omlette and pancakes...Get Katie on Dancing with the Stars.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

This Might Not Work Out So Well
It appears that President Obama will appoint Seattle Police Chief Richard “Gil” Kerlikowske to be the country's Drug Czar, which I always thought was the coolest title for a member of the Executive Branch.

This appointment is not without controversy. Kerlikowske has some kind of son (he's been referred to as "stepson," "adopted son," and "son from a previous marriage" -- by the time confirmation hearings start, he'll be known as the Chief's third cousin twice removed on his great uncle's side) who's had some rough patches with the law, including some drug arrests. He's also been in trouble for "cruelty to animals," which is particularly despicable and a quality that he shares with most psychopaths. I understand the fact that all families have their issues, but I think you'd want the leader of the war on drugs to at least be able to lead his own family away from drugs. (Maybe the cruelty to animals part while you're at it, too.) Also, didn't anyone in the Administration think of Traffic when they were considering this appointment?

Perhaps more troubling to me is that, on December 26, 2004, Chief Kerkilowke had his gun stolen from his unmarked police car, while he and his wife were shopping at the Pacific Place shopping mall in downtown Seattle. The couple parked at 10:30AM, and returned about 3:30PM to find that the gun, which had been stashed in that great hiding place, under the driver's seat, was gone. That's completely humiliating -- what kind of a guy is going to spend five hours at a mall on the day after Christmas? Was his cable out or something? Even giving them an hour for lunch, hopefully with some drinks, that's still four more hours than anyone should spend at a mall on that day. (Although it probably is a good idea to limit your access to weapons if you must spend that day at the mall.)

Maybe Chief Kerkilowke is the right man for the job, who knows. I'm sure it helps him that there's not exactly a long history of successful drug policy in this country, so the bar is low. For now, the Chief is excited about the possibilities, and also because he's heard there's great shopping in DC.

Monday, March 02, 2009

Nats Get New Mascot, Kind Of

So the Nats have somewhat of a new mascot.  Sure, it's the same old Screech.  But he's different.  He's older, as the Nats pr folks and that guy Clint explained at the unveiling today (as reported by D.C. Sports Bog hero Dan Steinberg).  He's like a teenager, so he'll be cooler and everything.  And his hat is removable, which will be a relief to that one guy who, in any Washington Post Nats-related chat, chimes in about how disrespectful it is that the old Screech's hat was affixed to his head, which made it impossible to hold his hand over his heart during the National Anthem.  I hope I never meet that guy.

Anyway, you'll note that the new Screech is tall and thin.  

That's Smiley Gonzalez in there!